Part of my anxiety involves the need to always have some kind of plan. An idea of what I want to do, when it needs to be completed by, how I’m going to do so and why it needs to be done. In a frustrating twist of fate, nine times out of ten it turns out to be very unproductive. Which obviously because the brain is such a funny little thing, it means I become even more anxious despite my organisational efforts. Meh, I do try. So when I think back to being a little girl and all the crazy jobs I said I’d have “when I grow up” *cue The Pussycat Dolls 2008 tune*, it makes me sigh and think “aaah, so I HAVE always been an obsessive nerd then”. In fact I may do a post on this purely so I can laugh at my 6 year old self. Who’s up for laughing at my expense? I know you are.
In typical Hannah fashion I’m going off on a tangent so back to the point. I came across this Albert Einstein quote when I was lost in the land of Pinterest, and it really struck a chord with me. There are so many things I love and enjoy, that inspire me and want to share with others. Many things which I have an opinion on, daydream about and wish for. The fact is I know I want to do a lot of things, my problem is I don’t quite know how to get there. Whether its career-wise, or just living life-wise I’m not sure how to make it happen. My brain thinks of all the practical things I can do, my gut is telling me to just stop and let it all fall into place and its a daily struggle between the two.
Despite the struggle to make my dreams a reality, just like this quote says I don’t feel like I have an obvious talent or an extraordinary personality but I believe I have passion and ambition. Wow this sounds like I’m writing my CV, but you get my drift. Sometimes I get so frustrated at my mental to do list and the sheer energy I have that I don’t know how to put to good use. I want to volunteer, write for more music magazines, keep writing on this blog, write short stories continue learning Spanish, get fit and take part in a fun run, cook meals with actual taste, buy my very own car, and most of all treat my parents and take my niece and nephew for a fun day out! Most of these can be done very easily but life gets in the way. I want to learn how to manage my time more effectively, learn to live in the moment a bit more, think positively and not get so bogged down with life plans – which is why I started Fizzy Lemon Life! Most of all I want to do what I love and that is write and document everything so I can remember it all in years to come. I honestly love the buzz of media, which is why I studied it at college for two years. Part of me still regrets not choosing it as my degree but you live and you learn. The writing, graphics, social media, photography and even the techy web stuff, it is just so interesting and I love the creative process.
Christine runs Project Light to Life, an inspiring bucket list blog. Her attitude to life is so refreshing and its really got me thinking about the way I want to live my life. Perhaps a bucket list section on my blog will be away for me to combat my anxiety, take hold of opportunities and learn to appreciate life in a new light and make for some great memories.
So I guess what I’m trying to say is that I don’t have everything figured out yet and my life plan doesn’t need to be set in stone because ultimately my passion will get me through. lets face it if you had have told me four years ago that I’d be where I am now I’d be in shock. Cheers Einstein for the words of wisdom.
“Keep your head up, kid. I know you can swim, but you gotta move your legs” – Augustines.